Chicken Wings and the Sophisticated Lady

I don’t know what it is about chicken wings but I just absolutely love good wings.  If I weren’t concerned about the fat content I would eat chicken wings at least twice a week. 

Wings are typically thought of as a man’s meal…but I’m here to tell you that you do not choose wings, they choose you.  You either have the gift of enjoying/appreciating a chicken wing or you don’t.  You know the people that I’m talking about – the people that eat a wing like string cheese…picking a few pieces of chicken off the bone and then they’re done.  I don’t understand these people, but I do know and love these people.

Shock would be the word that I would use to describe the look on some people’s face when they’ve seen me eat a chicken wing.  They don’t understand why I feel the need to thoroughly devour a wing…I guess I look at a wing as a sacrifice, meaning that some chicken has given its wing so that I might eat…the gospel bird, if you will.

DS Download:  In all seriousness, I can trace my love of chicken wings back to my Uncle Tony.  I clearly remember being eight or nine years old at a holiday get together with my Uncle, when he spotted a young girl, about my age picking at a wing and ultimately leaving it untouched.  I saw immediate outrage on his face!  My uncle, then proceeded to lead me through a George Costanza like tirade about the importance of eating a wing, and how, under NO CIRCUMSTANCES was I to leave chicken on a bone!  Being the hard core wing eater that he is, he also tried to sell me on sucking the marrow from the bone…but that was where I drew the line. 

I’m not sure if my uncle knew that his wing tirade would cement my love for wings, and create a life long commitment to not leaving meat on the bone.  Thanks to my uncle I have been in situations where I have devoured my wings, while my male counterpart has pecked at his wing like a baby chick.  More than once, while eating wings, I’ve received a stare from an onlooker that said you’ve changed…but that’s okay, when I am eating a chicken wing, my love for them and the history that we (me and the wing) have allows me to step outside of myself and enjoy the moment 🙂

The men in my family have definitely made an impression on the woman that I am today and I think that’s a beautiful thing!  Thanks to the men in my family I have an undying love for The Godfather part I and II, a belief that If given the tools I can be pretty handy, and most importantly, enough comfort in my own skin to devour a chicken wing – in public – and not give a hell…cheers!

The Best Wings in Washington DC:  Clydes, Evolve, and Old Ebbit Grill.


My Thoughts on Michael

I’m a little late to the party, but I think I’m finally ready to talk about Michael.  There’s been a lot said about Michael since his death, as I’m writing this I’m listening to what E Entertainment has got to say about his life.  We all know this story – the story of a young innocent and talented boy who rose to unparalleled stardom. 

In the weeks since Michael’s death every pundit or network television show has dissected his life.  I choose to remember what Michael meant to me. 

My clearest memory of Michael goes back to the album Thriller, specifically the video Thriller.  There are not many crystal clear memories that I have as far back as age four or five, but sitting in front of our old school television (the kind that had no remote, with the pop in and pop out buttons) with my father as I watched the Thriller video is a memory that has stayed with me.  I remember my father sitting on the chair behind me as I timidly watched the theatrics unfold…it was absolutely amazing, a young and beautiful black couple leaving a movie theater, walking into the night when suddenly Michael and crew turned into the walking dead.  As a young child these images were captivating.  

DS Download:  The memory is less about Michael and more about the fact that my psyche happened to capture that moment in time – and at that moment Michael happened to be present.  I think that was what Michael was like for so many people, for the longest time he was a part of the back drop of our lives, providing a soundtrack that moved us and  a foundation for truly understanding what good music was.

I’m not sure exactly what made my Michael memory so special…perhaps it was the first time I remember my father telling me that I had to make a decision.  I clearly remember him saying “if you’re going to be scared, I’m not going to let you watch it”…and even at that young age I remember thinking – how could I not be scared???  Regardless of my fear, I knew that my father was there to protect me from the walking dead!

I asked my Dad recently if he had any recollection of that memory, and he said no! LOL…One of the funniest things about growing older are the memories that you have that no one else seems to remember. 

Everyone had their Michael moments, all of us can remember a time and a place when Mike made us feel something and that’s a beautiful thing.

What is Sexy?

Have you ever stopped to think about sexiness?  And what it really means to be sexy?  If we believed what we were fed via the media, we would believe that sexy had a narrow definition. 

The media bombards us with subtle and not so subtle variations on what they define as sexy.  For a woman, it would be very easy to think that being sexy was acting/looking like Angelina, Halle, or Megan Fox; additionally, it would also be easy for a man to assume that sexiness meant carrying himself with that swagger of a Lenny Kravitz (yipes!!!), Brad Pitt or George Clooney.  The message being that one is sexy if they are beautiful. 

But if we dig deeper, and push back on the message that the media is sending us, it’s easy to see that this narrow definition of sexiness can set us up for a rude awakening in the real world. 

A couple of weekends ago I had my rude awakening.  An awakening that has absolutely encouraged me to pause before I seriously comment on what is and what is not sexy.

To set the scene, I was at Local 16, enjoying an evening of vodka tonics set to the soundtrack of the DJ’s tribute to Michael Jackson…though not yet crowded, the usual suspects were on the dance floor – and by “usual suspects” you know what I mean.  I’m talking about the people that seem to be purposely making a mockery of themselves on the dance floor, with enough gyrating, twirling, and rhythm-less movements to make you want to break them up (often times it seems as though they’re encouraging each other!). 

As I kept a steady eye on the floor, I looked on as a young lady inched her way to the dance floor and proceeded to act out a dance that looked like a full body dry heave.  The look on her face said that she was FEEEEEEEEEEELing it – feeling the moment, feeling the words to “Pretty Young Thing”, and feeling the idea that she had become a spectacle in the center of the dance floor.
If I’m completely honest, I looked at this girl with shock.  My exact thought was, if she knew how un-sexy she looked, she would surely stop….surely if she could see herself she would be embarrassed. 

But she never stopped.

DS Download:  I think she knew something that hit me full force that night – she knew that being sexy wasn’t about subscribing to a preformed definition of the thing, being sexy was about how you feel, and she was FEEEEEEEEEEELing it.  I get it.

Although I was ready to issue her a moving violation, there could have been someone in there that found her twisting and turning, and off beat lurching inspiring…in fact, there could have been someone in the place for which she was perfectly on beat. 

And I guess that’s what it’s all about, isn’t it? — Finding someone with whom you are on beat with. 

As the song played on I became less mesmerized by the woman’s bad dancing, and more mesmerized/fascinated by the woman’s certainty that she was sexy.  But wasn’t she though?  If she could see that she was – who was I to feel that she was not?  Her determination to FEEEEEL it reminded me of my mindset at my 30th birthday…I was in the zone, twirling around in my yellow dress like my life depended on it.  I’m sure someone at the club that night thought I looked ridiculous and was wishing that I would stop – but I was FEEEEEELing it, and why in the WORLD would you ever want to stop someone that was FEEEEEEELing it?

A Penny Saved

The most horrible thing about loaning someone money, is the person you become when you want your money back.  Nine times out of ten, you may not even NEED the money but that’s not the point – the point is, that if you loan someone…say, a co-worker or a classmate a dollar or two, you expect that they will give it back.

(When I was proofreading the paragraph above I had to chuckle at myself upon reading the second sentence…I bet the majority of you were right with me until I said “a dollar or two”…you probably thought I was eluding to substantial monetary amounts)  

I was always taught that you should only loan money that you can afford to giveaway – I guess the moral of this story is that I don’t feel like I have ANY money to give away…especially to people that are not my immediate friends or family.  When it comes to your real friends and family I can understand not keeping tabs – mostly, in those cases, you’re in a situation in which it’s a reciprocal relationship…I look out for you, you look out for me, and it’s understood.  But for co-workers…ones that you don’t know particularly well – the same rules do not apply!  So, if I loan a co-worker a dollar, I expect my dollar back.

So last week, I’m in the office.  My co-worker needs a dollar to put in the change machine to make change for a .50 item…I notice this, and offer to loan her a dollar.  Granted, I didn’t say “I am bequeathing this dollar to you with the expectation that you will repay me at your earliest convenience,” but still – I feel that it was implied…I notice that she makes change, gets her .50 item and puts the remaining .50 in her purse.  So I thought to myself “hmm, she’ll just give me a dollar in the next week or so.” 

It’s been a week and not only have I seen no dollar, I also haven’t seen any recognition of the fact that she owes me a dollar.  Do I feel like George Costanza at the very moment – YES…but, am I sticking by my belief that if I loan a co-worker a dollar that they should pay me back – YES. 

DS Download:  The rational part of me knows that 99.99 % of the time that you loan someone a dollar, they don’t even remember that they owe it to you; BUT there’s that small, George Costanza part of me that is very sure that my co-worker knows that because of the dollar amount that they borrowed, I would never have the audacity to ask for my dollar back…almost like a challenge! 

Or perhaps I’m being 99.99% ridiculous – which is all together, quite possible.

One of these days I’m going to put on a straight face and walk up to my co-worker and ask them to borrow two dollars.  When they place the money in my hand I will explain that not only will I not be paying them back, but that they can consider the second dollar interest on the dollar that I loaned them!  Just one little way I can stick it to “da” man…which, due to the most recent election means that I would be stickin it to myself :-).

Have a great weekend!

The Audacity of Entitlement

One of my biggest pet peeves is expressed entitlement.  Sometimes it’s a pervasive feeling you get in a place or sometimes – as I experienced this weekend – it’s a person attempting to cash-in their entitlement chips at your expense.  This weekend I had to put my foot down….

So, I’m in Safeway with my Uncle on the 4th of July patiently waiting in the self checkout line with my one item in hand.  My only obstacle to the checkout terminal was the nice woman with her child standing in front of me.  As the woman in front of me stepped up to the next available terminal I inched up to take my rightful place, and then, out of nowhere I see a woman with a huge cart attempting to inch in front of me with her cart in tow…before I even realized it my left hand went up to physically stop her from the brody that she was attempting.  I believe my exact words were “there’s a line here, what are you doing?”

DS Download:  The crazy thing is that the woman seemed shocked.  Shocked that I had the audacity to physically put my arm out and run a pass interference on her attempt to step right in front of me – I was having NONE of it.  As she inched back into place and I went forward to the check out terminal I actually noticed the woman glaring at me, and speaking under her breath and I was shocked.  I asked her if she was okay and inquired as to whether she had something she would like to say – to which she replied with a rude “no”…but, what did the woman think would happen?  Did she actually imagine that reckless act would go unnoticed?

I hope the woman that I encountered learned a valuable lesson – the lesson being that if you’re going to be bold enough to attempt a brazen move like stepping in front of someone in the supermarket, don’t be surprised if someone is bold enough to shut you down. 

More News at 11.