I took a sick day on Monday and while at home I was prompted – by my mother – to turn to Oprah to watch Steve Harvey spout his advice to women for finding Mr. Right. All in all, I thought the show was pretty cute. Steve, who can be slightly rude and condescending on his radio show, played well to the cameras, made me chuckle a few times, and gave some worthy advice to some of the single young ladies that had the courage to parade themselves on national television.
However, I was stopped in my tracks by the Five Question mantra that Steve touted at the end of the show…his ending point, was that there are five questions that every woman should ask a man when she meets them – here goes:
1. What are your short term goals?
2. What are your long term goals?
3. What are your views on relationships?
4. What do you think about me?
5. How do you feel about me?
By now, I’m pretty sure that my five regular readers have a clear picture of who I am…I typically can’t remember names, will occasionally forget a face, and will often botch introductions but I will have you know that I was able to type up those five questions off the top of my head with no problem. Why was I able to do this? Because these are the five MOST ridiculous questions that any woman could ask a man when she is first meeting him – in fact, those are five sure fire questions to ask if a woman wants to ensure that she won’t get asked on a second date.
It’s not that I’m against getting to know someone and asking questions on a first or second date but, I’m against the idea of a date masquerading as an interview – I am officially pushing back on the notion that I need to have questions prepared.
If you MUST go on a date with questions prepared, how about these five questions (sprinkled throughout the date):
1. How was your day?
2. You mentioned you traveled to x, y, and z…if you could plan another trip sometime soon where would you go?
3. If society wasn’t measuring you up – and telling you who you had to be – what would you love to do?
4. What are your thoughts on importing/exporting? <insert laugh here>
5. Do you feel it was in bad taste for Ramona to refer to the Countesses husband as an old man? <wait for awkward silence> then be prepared to learn that he doesn’t watch the Desperate Housewives of New York City (am i embarassed that i watch the show – yes; is it good entertainment – yes…check out the second video when you click the link).
DS Download: The only question you should make sure to ask when you’re first meeting a man that seems interested in seeing you again is – do you have a girlfriend? It can save hurt feelings and confusion. All of those other questions can be determined on a need to know basis. Who says that you’re ever going to see someone again after a first or second date?? Maybe you won’t like them – or vice versa, so why waste the time learning short term and long term goals on the first date!
Good luck out there!